My Story, Remmy’s Lesson: The Healing Power of Forgiveness

Why Forgiveness Isn't Just for Adults

Remmy’s Sticky Situation is a fun story for children about friendship, forgiveness, a bit of STEM and some social-emotional learning. All wrapped up in a sweet little mystery.
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But let’s be honest. Forgiveness is a BIG deal. It isn’t just something adults need to figure out — kids need it too. They need to learn early on that it’s okay to mess up, to own it, and to ask for forgiveness. And they also need to see what happens when we extend grace to others. Remmy's Sticky Situation (launching May 2) shows just that — a playful but powerful reminder that even children can experience the deep peace that comes from doing the right thing, even when it’s hard.

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The Crayon Incident: My First Taste of Guilt and Grace

I think my first real lesson in forgiveness came when I was about 10 years old. It started with a crayon. Silly, right? But this wasn't just any crayon. It was the most beautiful, shimmering shade I’d ever seen. It practically sparkled. Of course I don’t actually remember the color now. But I do remember the joy it gave me to think about how much beauty I could create with this single color. So, naturally, I stole it. From a friend. (I know, real smooth.)

But once I got home, the magic wore off fast. Guilt settled in like a storm cloud, and I couldn’t even use the crayon. I just stuck it in a drawer, hoping the guilt would go away. Eventually, my little-kid conscience got the better of me, and I returned it — apology and all. The surprising thing? My friend forgave me. Just like that.

That moment stuck with me. Not just because I felt relieved, but because I experienced something I couldn't attach a word to until years later: grace.

Fast Forward: When Forgiveness Isn’t So Simple

Fast forward a couple of decades, and I was facing a heartbreak that crayons couldn’t begin to fix. I was pregnant when my husband left me … for my best friend.

Yeah. That one stung.

I was devastated. Angry. Bitter. I turned to Scripture, not for peace or perspective, but for divine vengeance. I wanted fire from heaven — righteous judgment.

But God had other plans. Quietly, steadily, He began to speak to my heart. Not with lightning bolts, but with gentle nudges. Scripture here, a whisper there that said, "Forgive them."

Wait, what?

Writing the Letter I Didn’t Want to Write

I fought the idea. A lot. But God kept leading me back to one very uncomfortable truth: I wasn’t without fault. Yes, they hurt me. Deeply. But the way I handled it? My bitterness, my words, my actions — those weren’t exactly holy either.

So, I sat down to write a letter. A letter asking her for forgiveness. And let me tell you — writing that letter was brutal. Every time I wanted to say, “I’m sorry I did this, but you …” — God nudged me to delete the “but.” Over and over.

When I finally sent it, I felt something break loose in me. Like a heavy blanket of resentment had been lifted. I wasn’t writing that letter for applause or pity. I wasn’t letting anyone off the hook. I was simply putting them into God’s hands. And I was following God’s call to heal.

The Gift I Didn’t Expect

My ex-friend's response was surprisingly gracious. No, we didn’t become besties again. But we found a way to be civil, which turned out to be a blessing to our kids. That alone was a gift. But I did not anticipate the transformation that took place inside of me. 

Forgiveness didn’t erase the betrayal. It didn’t undo the pain alrealdy experienced. But it turned my bitterness into peace. It freed me from the cycle of replaying the hurt over and over again. And it reminded me that God wasn’t asking me to pretend everything was okay — He was inviting me to trust Him with my healing and my future.

What Scripture Taught Me About Forgiveness

Ephesians 4:32 says it plainly: “Be kind to one another, tenderhearted, forgiving one another, as God in Christ forgave you.”

And when Peter asked Jesus how many times he should forgive someone — “seven times?” — Jesus replied: “Not seven times, but seventy-seven times.” (Matthew 18:21-22)

Luke 6:37 echoes it: “Forgive, and you will be forgiven.”

God isn’t asking us to do anything He hasn’t already done — in the most radical, undeserved way possible. If He could forgive all of us by dying on a cross, I suppose I can forgive the people who’ve wounded me.
But I’ll be honest — I haven’t mastered it. Not even close. Especially when someone hurts one of my kids. That’s when the claws come out. Still, every step in this journey has brought me closer to understanding God’s grace.

Forgiveness: A Gift You Give Yourself

I think it's important to note that I didn't feel like forgiving them. I wanted to hate them forever for breaking up my young family. I felt they deserved it. But the twist is that it doesn't hurt the other person when you're full of bittterness toward them. Instead, it's like a leach, draining the joy out of life and destroying you from the inside-out.  But by taking steps God asked me to take, I am convinced that He released me from the bondage of bitterness. 

Forgiveness isn’t a weakness. It’s about releasing yourself from the weight of bitterness. It’s about choosing peace over revenge. And it’s absolutely something we need God’s help to do. I am confident that my outcome would not have been the same if left to my own feelings, or the ideals of the world. See, I didn't feel like forgiving them, nor did I feel like I needed to ask forgiveness. I’m still learning. Still stumbling. Still needing grace. But I’ve learned that when we let go — when we truly forgive — we make space in our hearts for healing, growth, and joy again.

And honestly, that’s a gift worth giving.

The Gift of Forgiveness — for All Ages
 
And I’ve come to believe that forgiveness is one of the most powerful gifts we can give ourselves — and each other. But it’s also one of the most important lessons we can teach our children.
 
Remmy’s Sticky Situation helps open that door. It starts the conversation about right and wrong, about guilt and grace, and about the courage it takes to say “I’m sorry.” Because when kids learn to forgive — and be forgiven — they’re not just becoming better people. They’re growing into hearts that can experience the joy and freedom God always intended.
 
And that, my friend, is where peace begins.

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